America. The Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave. The Land of Milk and Honey. The Melting Pot. The Stars and Stripes. ‘Murica. Okay, there are loads more nicknames, but you get the picture. We have to admit, America hasn’t had a good time of it lately. What with the new president, the growing crime rate, the threat of imminent nuclear war and the growing divide between America and the rest of the world, we’re all in need of a good laugh.
Thankfully, we’re here to help. As we all know, the nation of stars and stripes is made up of 50 states – which are all represented as a star on the American flag. However, many people in the US and across the world still believe the common misconception that America has 52 states to its name, which just isn’t true (sorry to break the news). The reason so many people get confused is that they believe Washington DC and Puerto Rico are states. Unfortunately for them, Washington DC is the capital of the United States of America, but is a federal district rather than a state in itself (just like London is the capital of the UK and Cairo is the capital of Egypt), and Puerto Rico is an inhabited territory. Fortunately for you, this will make learning all of the American states just that little bit easier, and you’ll be rolling them off your tongue just like Ross in Friends.
Every single American state has their own distinct quality. It may be the people, it may be the landscape, or it may even be the animals (we’re talking about you, Wyoming). Sometimes, these little characteristics are pretty darn hilarious, and some people manage to capture the perfect picture to sum it up. Here, each state is perfectly represented by one laugh out loud photograph. So, which one is your state?
It’s a well-known fact that the people of Alabama are fishing lovers through and through. Because who doesn’t love sitting for hours on end trying to catch a fish with a pole? With a rich history of saltwater and freshwater fishing, they’ll do anything to get out on the water. Quite literally, anything. This guy wouldn’t let his lack of boat stop him from grabbing his catch of the day. We especially like the personalized seat. That is true craftsmanship, sir.
I mean, do we need to say anymore? This is Alaska. We don’t think we could find another picture which could scream ALASKA as much as this one. Bears? Check. Bears having a fight? Check. Bears having a fight in the middle of the road? Check. Bears having a fight in the middle of the road while Alaskan onlookers take photos on their phones? Check. One of those onlookers is actually phoning her boss to tell them that they’ll be late because those darn bears are brawling again. So selfish. Some people have to work, y’know. Take your business elsewhere, bears.
As the Merrymen famously sung, the people of Arizona are feeling hot, hot, hot (okay, they didn’t really sing that exactly, but it was along the same lines). Nevertheless, if you’ve ever been to The Copper State, you’ll know that Arizona is dry, hot and almost unbearable – you know unless you’re a lizard. Because of this intense heat and dryness, the Arizona forests are extremely flammable, and wildfires are common. Thanks to our high school science lessons, we know that fire and methane don’t mix – so hold it in, y’all.
Let’s be honest, this guy is living the life down in Arkansas, isn’t he? The people of Arkansas just love their hunting, but sometimes it can just be sooooo tiring walking through the forests. Instead, this genius has got his set-up just right. The hot tub is on (and we have to admit, that looks incredibly hot. It’s practically boiling!) the beer has been opened, and he’s got his neon hat on so he can be seen by the other hunters – but really he’s just done that so he can make them jealous.
Cor, Miss California has changed a bit, hasn’t she? Over the last few years, musicians have given us an insight into the wonderful state of California. The Red Hot Chilli Peppers warned us of the brainwashing ways of Hollywood (yikes), and Katy Perry told us that the girls were unforgettable! Well… we don’t disagree with that. This photo was taken during the Los Angeles Pride Parade, where the women were out in full force embracing their assets. You go, girl!
Work the camera, girl. Do your best ‘I want a nut’ face. That’s it. Colorado offers one of the most incredible landscapes in America, and its residents love the mountains, the grassy plains and the great outdoors (fresh air? What’s that?). This state is also known to be one of the most liberal in the US. These two factors combined make for one nutty outcome. Yep, that really is a woman dressed up as a flying squirrel frolicking on a mountain.
If you’ve ever been to Connecticut, you’ll know that they have a reputation for being a little strict on their prices. Everything costs way more than it would anyone else, and they ALWAYS get their money’s worth – even when it comes to throwing rocks. And you better listen to what the sign says and pay that 50 cents (plus tax). If not, the office will get the attack seagull on you. And you don’t want that. He wants his money.
Kendrick Lamar always told us to be humble (and a lot of other things which are just NSFW) – but it seems Delaware just didn’t get this memo. We get it; you’re the home of tax-free shopping. Big whoop. Yeah, we get it, you were the nation’s first state. Stop bragging. Do you need a bigger sign? Delaware is like the Hermione Granger of states. We get it; you’re the best, you’re a small wonder. We just have to buckle up and deal with it.
We’re not sure what happened with Florida. Is the air a bit different down there? Maybe the closeness of the Equator is having a weird effect on them. Nevertheless, the term ‘Florida Man’ is often used in (arguably very strange) news reports and this guy pretty much sums it up. He’s supporting the alligators (of course. We expect nothing less), sporting a rather out-there tattoo, using genius inventions to keep his ancient mobile phone on his jeans, and rocking that sweet ‘do. These ‘Florida Men’ need their own show.
Nearly all of the US states are known for one specific export. For Georgia, it’s the good ol’ juicy peaches. The lovely polite gentlemen and ladies of this state adore their peaches and love growing and selling them on across the country. Thankfully, they don’t do the same with dictionaries. Otherwise, they would go out of business pretty quickly. Nevertheless, we’re totally attracted by their bright and bubbly sign, and would definitely buy their ‘peches.’ Wonder if they taste any different to normal peaches?
Just in case you’re wondering; no, this isn’t a scene from The Walking Dead. Instead, what you’re looking at, dear readers, is a whole entire school bus that has been engulfed by lava. You know, no biggie. Despite its seemingly beautiful exterior, the island of Hawaii is actually built atop numerous active volcanoes that could erupt and spew out hot, boiling lava at any moment. Because that’s the risk you take when you want to eat waffles and pet walruses like on 50 First Dates.
When you’re looking for a new destination to visit with the family, you probably look at all of the different options available. You’ll look on the official web pages to see what attractions and sights they offer, to keep you entertained throughout your stay. For many, Idaho wouldn’t be the first vacation choice – and it seems the state sign isn’t exactly sure on its abilities as a fun destination either. It did make us laugh though, so at least that’s something.
When many people think of Illinois, they immediately think of Chicago. And why wouldn’t they? The Windy City is pretty darn awesome – but you might get a bit of a shock as you walk down the street. Despite its city-vibe and numerous attractions, Chicago is one of the most dangerous places in the world. Because of this, tanks like this one will just cruise down the street while you’re going about your daily business. It’s kinda weird, but you’ll get used to it.
If you’re not a confident driver, we’d recommend getting someone else to drive during your trip to Indiana. The state is often called the ‘crossroads of America’ because of its ridiculous highways, roads, and interstates. And it’s pretty darn confusing. However, it’s the perfect place to check out all of the people who have traveled across the country and just happen to pass through Indiana with their pants down when you’re taking a picture. That’s one for the photo album.
Feeling thirsty? There’s no denying it; Iowa is pretty scarce. With a hugely successful agricultural industry, the majority of this state is full of rolling fields, large grassy plains and long winding roads taking you from one end of Iowa to the other (pretty sharpish). However, the journey out of Iowa can be pretty long, boring and make you pretty thirsty. Luckily, there’s this super handy soda stop along the way to quench your thirst. How convenient.
Unless you’ve been hiding under a rock for your whole life (if so, we’re very sorry to hear that), you’ll know the story of Dorothy and her fairly windy trip from Kansas to the land of Oz. Many people don’t realize that the story wasn’t too far away from the truth (okay, you got us. Munchkins don’t really exist). The state of Kansas is slap bang in the middle of tornado alley, so just make sure your ‘no place like home’ comes complete with a bunker. Because you’ll need it.
There’s nothing we love more than Kentucky Fried Chicken (I mean, how does the skin get so yummy?) but we are a bit dubious about eating it again if it’s actually from Kentucky. Especially if it’s from this farm. We didn’t think any spellings could get any worse than Georgia’s ‘peches’ but we reckon Kentucky takes the (KFC) bucket with these corkers. We wonder if the ‘biddies’ and the ‘growd’ ‘chickun’s’ taste any different? Not sure we want to find out.
We hope the ‘Florida Man’ doesn’t see this photo. Otherwise, he might get a little jealous. Remarkably, there are people in Louisiana that love the ‘gators more than the people of Florida (we know, we didn’t think it could happen either). In fact, some of them consider them to be part of their family – and even get their kids involved. Well, we can’t say the health and safety department would like this, but whatever floats your boat.
Yep, we had to double take this photo too. Actually, the more you look at it, the more bizarre it gets. We’re not sure why anyone would want to leave the beautiful state of Maine, but this guy seems to be having a good go at it – using a block of ice to propel him across the river, with a six-pack on hand, and a pole (maybe for fishing? He needs to have a chat with Alabama for that).
Many people believe their state holds the worst drivers in the world (although if you don’t, it’s probably you who’s the bad driver) but no state is as bad as Maryland, that’s for darn sure. Car crashes and burning tires are common sights when you drive around Maryland – and as you drive in, the smell of gasoline hits your nostrils. But anyways, we hope you enjoy your visit! They have nice cookies though, so we’ll let them off.
One thing we love about all the different states in America is all of the different accents that come from different areas of the country. And alongside their ridiculous weather patterns (who knows what the day will be like) Massachusetts is also known for its… err… unique accents. However, the guys and gals in Massachusetts seem to know that they’re a little different and want everyone to know that. Watch out for the wicked stawm that’s comin’!
For some reason, we can’t see many liberals living in Michigan – we can’t put our finger on why, though. Oh yeah, it could be the fact that these guys just love their guns, and will protect their right to arm themselves no matter what. The people of Michigan don’t wanna hide this either, considering they cover their cars with the hides and horns of – well – A LOT of animals. We can’t even tell where one body begins and another one ends.
We all know that US states like to give themselves some official nicknames. Minnesota is often called The Lone Star State, The Gopher State and The Land of 10,000 Lakes. However, Minnesota is pretty greedy and wants another one added to the list – but it doesn’t really fit (and not to mention the fact that they’ve kinda stolen it from Florida). Yeah, we’ll listen to your request to change your name to The Sunshine State, Minnesota… just after you’ve cleared all of that snow away.
When it comes to food, no state does it better than Mississippi. One of their most valued meals is the Mississippi which consists of meat, meat and more meat (so vegetarians need not apply because you’ll be pretty hungry). However, the people of Mississippi are incredibly protective over their barbecue and their tools to make it – just like this guy, who looks like he’ll knock you over in one fell swoop if you even breathe over his masterpiece.
If you’ve ever been to Missouri, you’ll know that it’s actually an incredibly pleasant place to visit (you didn’t expect that, did you?) The midwestern state offers some of the best attractions and sights around, including the Gateway Arch, the National World War I Museum, and the incredible jazz scene. However, a trip to Missouri will normally end in you seeing something you just can’t explain – like this monster truck school bus. Why is this a thing?
Don’t get us wrong; we love animals. We love our pets, we love naturally roaming creatures, and we fully respect their lives (although maybe not spiders and snakes. You know, for obvious reasons). However, even we have to admit that Montana is in a league of its own – and not one we’d particularly like to join. In this small state, moose crossings cover the terrain and men share their hot tubs with huge grizzly bears. That’s the way they roll.
It’s no secret that Nebraska is kinda in the middle of nowhere, with the Great Plains and the Sandhills making up most of the land. Of course, when you’re surrounded by nature, there’s a slight odor. However, we now question whether the odor is Nebraska itself – or these neat little DIY toilets they set up on the side of the road. We reckon it could be a combination of the two. Remember to flush! (If you can).
Nevada, the home to Sin City! We all know that Nevada is one of the most lenient places in the US, with millions of people flocking there each year to gamble their money away, take a trip to a local brothel or drink themselves silly. Nebraska is the epitome of excess and outlandish behavior. But there are just some things they just won’t tolerate. Apparently lobsters are one of them, as they are totally illegal. Of course. Why not…
New Hampshire is one of the prettiest states in the US and is known for its quaint towns and cities; it’s woodland walks and its mountainous national parks. The state is also known for being pretty into its colonial and historical past. However, it seems they may be a little stuck in the past, as this sign still exists in the state. Hopefully, it’s all a (pretty poor) joke or they’re just reminding the painter and decorator what they want for the walls in their house.
Yep, we only have MTV to blame for this mess. Nowadays, most people associate New Jersey with the awful (yet slightly addictive) MTV reality show, ‘Jersey Shore’ and believe the state is full of mini Snooki’s and DJ Pauly D’s living it large and having arguments all the time. Although this isn’t the case (for the most part), there are still people in the state who hope to continue the Jersey Shore legacy – like these guys – who obviously all went to the same barber.
We can imagine many people will now be quitting their jobs moving to New Mexico with their low-riders – because it’s pretty cool that a whole state will designate parking to these modified cars. And of course, where you have laws, you also have regulations, so you have to make sure you scrape the pavement (although we can’t see how that is beneficial or good for the car in any way). They must have a real demand for low-rider parking spaces. Good on them. We think.
When it comes to describing a state in one photograph – this little pizza rat has hit the nail on the head. There are two things we know (and kinda love) New York for; it’s incredible pizza slices and the rats that wander around the streets and subway systems. And this little rat is doing what all New Yorkers do. It’s running away from the sky-high rent he has to pay, and drowning his sorrows in pizza. Works a charm.
Come on, North Carolina, you can do better than that. We really hope South Carolina gave its northern neighbor a talking to after this disaster – as this doesn’t bode well for the school system in the state. We hope the children (try to) completely ignore the huge letters in the middle of the road and learn how to spell properly. However, there could be a chance the person who did this was actually trying to spell, ‘shhhhh… cool.’ Although we highly doubt that.
There are certain things that just work together. There’s peanut butter and jelly; there’s Mickey and Minnie, there’s Sandy and Danny – and there’s ice hockey and guns? Well, we’re not sure on that. However, it seems to be a thing in North Dakota, and this guy is spoiling the people of North Dakota by raffling off 200 guns. I mean, raffles have certainly changed since my day. Where have the jam jars, chocolate boxes and old books gone?
Unfortunately, some people in the Buckeye State seem to lack a little bit of modesty and common sense in certain situations – just like these guys. What do you do when you attend a funeral? Well, these people thought it was a great idea to spell out Ohio with their arms and a cross behind them. Oh, all while a body lies next to them in a coffin. Or maybe the body was supposed to be the ‘I’? Perfect timing, guys. Perhaps they forgot where they were from? We hope this helped to remind them…
We have to give the students of Oklahoma a heck load of credit – because this is genius. We all dread the day that our bike finally breaks and the wheels are unsalvageable. However, these students managed to take advantage of their hobby to fix their bike. What do they love the most? Drinking beer. But what do you do with the leftover kegs? The people of Oklahoma have got it covered. It does surprise us that 56% of Oklahoma students drop out of college, it really does.
The state of Oregon is experiencing an epidemic. There is something that is taking over their state and leaving them all speechless. It is, of course, the hipster. Yes. It has finally happened, and they have lost control over their state. This is shown by the bearded, poncho-wearing hipster wearing the beanie hat riding the bus. And if you look closer at the rare hipster, you’ll notice he is in his natural element, tapping away on a typewriter. We repeat… on a bus.
The Amish are an intriguing bunch, mostly because they are so far removed from the average American’s way of life. Although Amish communities are dwindling in the United States, a few communities still remain in the state of Pennsylvania. But despite what we all think, they’re not completely against modern inventions. Just look at this young lady skating home to her parents with her groceries in hand. She must have a need, a need for speed.
Perhaps this is why the state of Nevada say lobsters are illegal?! Dangerous creatures, lobsters. And it seems the state of Rhode Island is no stranger to a few lobster fisticuffs. The Ocean State is teeming with these yummy sea creatures, but they’re not easy to catch as they put up one heck of a fight. Don’t ever leave them alone with each other either. We reckon the green one has got this in the bag. FIGHT!
Okay, we take back what we said earlier – maybe South Carolina shouldn’t be having a word with North Carolina to make sure their spellings are correct. South Carolina has a reputation for being a state of rednecks and those who are incredibly politically conservative. This might be because, they love their guns, chevy pickup trucks and beer. And they learn to love them young. This mother is posing with three of the things she loves most in the world – oh, and her son.
If you’ve never been to South Dakota before – oh, you’re in for a right treat. Although this huge expanse of National Parks and few people has little to offer in terms of fun attractions (mostly because it’s a load of grass) South Dakota offers two things you’ll struggle to find anywhere else; the incredible faces of Mt. Rushmore, and a whole load of Bison. Unfortunately, these Bison cause a few problems when it comes to reading signs, because, well, they can’t read.
The old south. The Southern states definitely have a reputation – and if you’re not sure what it is, this picture just about sums it up. The men of Tennessee swear by few rules, but their right to bear arms is one they will cherish beyond anything else. These natural hunters just love to don their camouflaged pants and frolic in the woods. And once they’re done they’ll undo their top buttons and crack open a cold one.
Although we know it’s part of America, it seems like Texans are in a completely different country (or maybe even a different planet). To us, taking your horse and cow to the drive-in is the most uncomfortable form of transport you could have. But for Texans, it’s your average Sunday. We really, really hope this person chose the vegetarian option. Although it could explain why the cow looks so grumpy. They’re about to eat his pal.
The state of Utah is full of Mormons – in fact, 40% of Salt Lake City are Mormons! Mormon men are known for their many wives and aren’t shy about it either. The guy who owns this mini-van just loves to show off his wives and children (and dogs) to the other residents in Utah. Although we really hope he doesn’t just have the one minivan, because that will be an incredibly tight squeeze for five adults, twelve children, and three dogs.
I mean, what else do you expect? Vermont is right on the border between America and Canada, so OF COURSE, The Green Mountain State is going to be overrun with moose. The Canadian spirit and generosity have obviously rubbed off on the family who owns this house, as we can’t say we’d be too happy to share a kiddie pool with a bunch of moose, or even let them in the backyard in the first place. But these Moose do what they want. Moose pool party, anyone?
We’re becoming increasingly worried about the lack of spelling skills many of these states possess – however, we have to admire this guy’s generosity. Not many people would let their punters try a free sample of some of their homemade (and illegal) Moonshine. Now that’s real salesmanship. Unfortunately, we would feel a little uneasy trying a drink in a gasoline canister, on the side of the road in Virginia. But that’s just us. Don’t worry Bill Jones; we won’t tell ‘pohlice.’
If you’ve ever been to Washington, you’ll know that some people are particularly obsessed with Bigfoot/Sasquatch. (We’re not sure why, but there ya go). Someone in Washington took this obsession as far as making him his own personal drivers license in the DMV. So now we know that Bigfoot weighs 695 pounds, has piercing red eyes and was born in 1970! Oh, and that he must wear corrective deodorant. We can die happy now.
There’s only one way to describe the people of West Virginia – they don’t play by the rules. Nope, the people of the mountain state do what they want, when they want it. However, there are certain things that are expected of the locals. One; you have to have a poorly cut mullet haircut. Two; no shirts are allowed. Three; meh, shoes are optional. Four; you just have to have a photoshoot with your pickup truck.
We all know that Wisconsin is America’s Dairyland, and they produce some of the yummiest cheese in the country. However, business is all about growth – and this Liquor & Cheese Drive-Thru has absolutely nailed their expansion. Because there’s only so much cheese you can eat right? Luckily, the cheese goes down much better when you can pick up a bottle of Rumchata at the same time. You don’t even need to go into the store anymore. Genius.
We bet South Dakota are jealous of these guys. The state of Wyoming is overrun with Bison, and they just love the snowy conditions in the winter. In fact, there are so many Bison that they outnumber the number of cars on their roads! Residents of Wyoming know that the Bison take precedence over their own livelihoods, and you’ve just gotta deal with it if you’re late for work because it’s their road – you’re just simply on it.